Rav Menashe Klein: Going To A Yeshiva When A Parent Objects
Rav Menashe Klein, the Ungvar Rov (Mishneh Halachos 6:158) was asked by a young man if he was permitted to go to learn in a Yeshiva against the wishes of his father. The Rov refused to answer his question because the questioner did not write to him the reason for his father's objection.
In principal, says Rav Klein, this is an old question dating back to the Trumas HaDeshen and brought in Shulchan Aruch (YD 240:25). The halacha is that if a talmid wants to go learn by a Rebbi, even far away from home, and his parents are nervous about the physical dangers, he may go against their wishes.
However there are certain objections the father can raise that are valid and then the son is not permitted to go learn there. The gemara in Kesubos (71a) says that if a husband forbids his wife from going to simchos or visiting aveilim, she can demand a divorce and receive her full kesuba. However if he claims that there are people there that behave immodestly, if there is strong basis for his claim his objection is justifiable.
Similarly, if the father feels that the Rebbi lacks Yiras Shamayim or that the other talmidim may be a bad influence, then his objection stands, but only if there is validity to his claim.
Important Note: We try to convey the Tshuva to the best of our ability. We admit that our understanding may not be accurate. One should learn the tshuva to verify the accuracy of our interpretation. Please also understand that this Tshuva may not be the final word on this topic. One should consult a Rav before drawing any conclusions.
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